Welp!!! Just gonna say I’m not a professional writer so my punctuation and composition whatever you wanna call it is gonna suck ballz….. just putting that out there 🙂
How should I start……
Once upon a f*cking time this Canadian nerd girl (me) was playing an online game that was super funsies!!!!! Through all my battles, quests, and adventures I became friends with a lovely gent who resided in the USA. The friendship blossomed as we battled and chatted nights away. Eventually we decided, after a year of Skype vid chats, that we should meet and see if there is some real spark IRL (in real life). One long ass 14 hour flight from Dawson Creek BC to Philadelphia PA lattteeeeeeeeeeerrrrr…… I was there!!! I got my luggage and proceeded to get my rental car (which I got a deal on because the clerk lol’d when I gave him my address for Dawson Creek and I started singing the theme song to the TV show: Free upgrade bitches!!!) and drove to Reading PA and met my future hubs/love of my life/spouse/best friend/man slave/man child etc…….. So yes you guessed it, total sparks baby!
So holy balls, fast forward a year to April 2014 and I was on a long ass plane ride (again) to PA with my Fiancee Visa and wedding dress in hand to be welcomed into an amazing family waiting for me. We got hitched and bought a house and I couldn’t work for like five f*cking months cause I had to wait for my authorization to be allowed blah blah f*cking BLAH! It was a little tough going from working oil field hours (12 hour days, 2 weeks in 1 week out) to being a (TEMPORARY) housewifey!
Present day and total marital bliss! We are happy and employed with jobs we love and have a rescue fur baby boxer named Kiki!!! We have had ups and downs like all married couples have of course but we are doing pretty good IMO! The only thing that has bothered me is our F*CKING FINANCES! We have a pretty good handle on them but I have felt like we haven’t been getting anywhere…
We have this asshole living with us and she’s a total end game Boss on hard mode! She’s like this chubby-money-sucking-alien Queen (debt) and no matter how much DPS/DOTs (money) we throw at her the bitch won’t die! What a HO!!! RIGHT??????
So all that being said I hope you follow along with me on our potty mouth journey of slaying our Debt Monster/Queen/Boss/Slutbag… I think I’m gonna give her a name….
Until then! SMOOCHES!